8 Things I Learned in the Seventh Year of Marriage

By Jessica Swartz April 21, 2023 33 mins read 81 Views

It was easy to recall the most important things I learned in the first couple of years of marriage. It feels like time is rushing by, and it's hard to remember what I learned during a year which seemed like it was a flash in the pan. Last year, I was terribly uncomfortable and thought it would never end. Now we have a nine-month-old who is growing by the minute. At times, I mourned that life before...but life is much better now. This year has been filled with many ups and lows. I am so thankful to have shared it with Brian. This year I only shared 8 things that I learned. Normally, I share 10 lessons I have learned over the course of a year. This is due to my brain shrinking during pregnancy. I missed out on some of the most important learning moments.

The timing is crucial. This week I will be 35 years old and people have asked me if I wished I had Avery when I was younger. The answer is a resounding NO. I was not ready mentally, spiritually or financially. Our relationship also wasn't prepared. Brian and I tried to get pregnant for some time, but it didn't work. We accepted the fact that we would probably not have a baby and were happy with it. I believe the universe had another plan. Our relationship had to be worked through, we had to heal wounds and grow. Once we had overcome many of these hurdles, we became pregnant. It was the right time in our life together. It was a reminder that we both had to trust in the universe.
Avery has brought Avery and I even closer. I know having a baby won't solve all your problems but it has brought us closer. As we raise our little one together, we will face many challenges. But knowing that we're in this TOGETHER gives us both a sense of empowerment. We are always there for each other and want to see the other succeed. This will help Avery. We want Avery to see how we work together, support each other in difficult times, and what equal love is like. Our relationship has been strengthened by having the same goal.
Do not sweat the small things. We don't worry about the little things as much now that Avery has taken over our daily agenda. Perhaps there isn't enough time to do that anymore? Who knows? The frustration over the small things like not cleaning the dishes or leaving the drawers open has mostly disappeared. It's probably because he is such a hands-on dad. He's there for us both so much during the day. Sometimes he does those tasks and other times I do them, but we always remember that we work together. It's quite refreshing.
Brian has changed my view of him. It's a common thing to hear from friends who have had children. And it is so true. Brian and Avery together is just the best. He has a completely new side that has emerged as he attempts to make Avery laugh. He's also had to develop a new level of patience and is determined to make her feel loved each day. You have a deep love for your children that is unmatched. I am so fortunate to be able to watch him grow into a father and flourish in his new role.
Fighting is much harder than having a conversation. We had heated moments when we brought Avery into our home because we both felt overwhelmed by the newness. It was a good lesson in staying calm, taking a deep breath and having a discussion about difficult moments rather than letting them turn into anger. We want Avery to be able to handle difficult situations with grace, and we need to model that for her.
Support time apart from each other. I was always very supportive when Brian took time off, but I felt a lot worse when Avery returned home and I couldn't leave like he did. After some practice, I became more and more comfortable without Brian's assistance with Avery, even for a couple of hours or days. I know that it is important for him have time with his friends and alone, so I worked hard to push my nerves to the side during this first year as a mother to ensure he has time. HA!
After having a child, intimacy is difficult. Let's get realllll personal. Do you know that every woman or man tells the joke about adding an additional stitch to a woman's stitches after giving birth? To tighten up the things a little? This is not something I can relate to. I don't relate to this at all. This, combined with the fact I don't have a libido while breastfeeding and feeling there isn’t enough time in the days has all led to a loss of intimacy. I can't wait to regain that intimacy. I can't wait to reconnect with Brian and feel like myself again. It's a tough postpartum period!
I'm still learning this lesson. I am not a very good listener, and I don't really like it. In this first year as a parent, my mind is in many directions. I'm nursing, pumping and supplying, showering, doing work, ensuring she gets enough food, water and sleep, checking that she doesn't hit her head or fall, checking if her stomach hurts, if she's teething, if she's getting enough solid foods, etc., etc., so it's not surprising that I don't listen to what he's telling me. I have to work harder at it and be more aware of this.

Brian is a great partner. I am very fortunate to have found him. I'm very lucky to have a partner like Brian. What a freaking awesome year. Let's hope that next year will be even better!

The article 8 Things I Learned After Seven Years of Marriage first appeared on PaleOMG.

By: juli
Title: 8 Things I Learned in the Seventh Year of Marriage
Sourced From: paleomg.com/8-things-i-learned-in-the-seventh-year-of-marriage/
Published Date: Thu, 20 Apr 2023 13:38:14 +0000

Frequently Asked Questions

How to make the Paleo Diet Work for You?

A paleo lifestyle does not mean living a strict diet. It's about changing the way you live your life. It requires dedication and commitment to make sure it fits in your busy schedule.

Understanding what foods are included in the paleo diet and which alternatives can be substituted is key when making this transition. Many people find that shopping and meal prepping become a big part of their weekly routine. Paleo-followers must pay attention to every detail. Before you buy any item, make sure to inspect it.

People who are constantly on the move will find it easier to eat healthy and have snacks or meals ready to go. You might be tempted to order takeout if you are trying to increase your nutrition intake. However, there are many restaurants that offer low-carb or gluten free options and even accessorized meals. Premeditation and creativity allow you to enjoy a night out while still achieving your goals.

It's important not to let it overwhelm you. However, planning will help you stick to the paleo diet and make it easy to incorporate delicious gourmet recipes into your daily life. Make sure to prioritize nutrients-dense ingredients and not processed products. Focus on high-quality protein sources such as grass-fed beef or seasonal vegetables. You can still indulge in Paleo-approved treats if you want to stay energized throughout the day.

What fruits are Paleo-friendly?

Fabulous! The Paleo Diet is an excellent place to start a health and nutrition journey. Eating Paleo means adapting your diet to the foods available during pre-agricultural periods, like lean meats, seafood, fruit, vegetables, nuts, and seeds.

This eating style helps to reduce inflammation. It also eliminates processed foods, added sugars, processed vegetable oils, and other harmful ingredients that can cause damage to the body. These things can be thrown out and you will find delicious whole foods rich in nutrients that will improve your health.

Because fruits provide vitamins and minerals such as Vitamin C in oranges and strawberries and manganese (in bananas), they are an integral part of Paleo. Apples, pears and melons, as well as papayas, mangoes, melons and limes, are all other fruits. All are packed with antioxidants your body needs for optimal performance.

You can add fibre-rich fruits to your meals and snacks throughout the day. If you want something sweet, but not sugar-laden, you can also experiment with blending different fruits into smoothies.

A healthy diet that includes plenty of nutrient-dense fruits can help curb your appetite and provide powerful antioxidants for your body to keep it running at its best. You get energy from fruit without them weighing you down. Get creative by combining fruits into your meals throughout the day.

What snacks can you eat on a Paleo diet?

To keep your body healthy and happy, you must fuel it with the right foods. There are many diets out there, but the Paleo diet is the most popular. It's easy to eat like a Caveman. But if you do it right, you will be rewarded with a lot of health benefits.

What are some Paleo snacks? In general, snacks should be light yet satisfying to extend energy levels between meals. You can find something you are looking for: frozen blueberries or fresh fruit, beef jerky, roasted almonds, dark chocolate (cocoa paste can also be great as a snack when combined with coconut oil); avocado smoothie or guacamole; pumpkin seeds or sunflower seed; coconut chips; flax crackers; coconut butter; almond butter; and apple and almond butter.

There are so many options! You can choose from sweet or savoury snacks. The best part? These snacks are great for satisfying your cravings while still adhering to Paleo principles. Grab your favorite snacks and get ready to live the good life.

The Paleo Diet is for everyone!

Paleo Diet shouldn't be used by anyone looking for a quick fix. This eating plan doesn't require drastic lifestyle changes or quick fixes. For those who are focused on weight loss, it may take several months before they see the results they desire.

The Paleo Diet also isn't ideal for anyone with any kind of dietary restrictions or food allergies--particularly gluten avoidance, as some grains aren't appropriate choices. Paleolithic recipes can cause people with high protein needs to feel overwhelmed.

Those bouncing between fad diets constantly won't benefit either since the idea is to stick to the same routine, even if that means changing ingredients slightly here and there. The commitment level is essential when committing to the Paleo Diet, so frequent diet jumpers should look elsewhere.

Additionally, people who don't have time or the ability to prepare healthy meals each day might miss out on the benefits of this lifestyle. Typically, convenience foods are not included in this diet.

What food groups are best avoided when following a Paleo diet

A diet that excludes grains, legumes dairy, and processed food can provide dramatic health benefits. Paleo has recently become very popular.

However, many people don’t know that this diet has certain food groups they should avoid. You must eliminate all foods containing dairy, grains, legumes, and processed ingredients.

This means giving up bread, pasta, pizzas chips, crackers, and baked goods such cookies, cakes, and pizzas. And you'll want to reduce consumption of conventional dairy products such as milk and cheese.

Last but not least, it is important to eliminate processed foods such frozen meals and canned soups from your daily food plan. Your body will not thrive if it isn't exposed to empty calories, refined carbs, and unhealthy fats.

The Paleo diet is a great way to achieve your nutrition and health goals, while still enjoying delicious meals. It will be a rewarding experience.

Can you eat popcorn on the Paleo diet?

Exploring the Paleo diet, it's important to make informed decisions about what snacks and meals fit within the plan. One of the popular food items that can be confusing to include is popcorn. Can you eat popcorn if you are following a Paleo diet

The simple answer is: although it's made from corn (a vegetable that doesn’t comply with Paleo guidelines), it isn’t inherently unhealthy. Traditional popcorn is not recommended for Paleo-followers due to its high-carbohydrate content.

That said, some alternatives are allowed in this style of eating plan. Coconut milk popsicles are a great way to satisfy your sweet tooth without compromising your nutritional intake. If you prefer making your own snacks, almond flour and cauliflower crackers are great options!

Regardless of what snack you choose while on this diet, read labels and ingredients carefully before purchasing any packaged foods. This will ensure that you don't compromise your nutritional goals by eating foods with refined carbs or added sugar.

You should explore all options when choosing snacks that you can eat on the Paleo diet, including popcorn! This will help you find the perfect snack to fit in your daily meals.

Paleo is there any way to eat cheese?

Sometimes, cheese temptation can be too tempting for those who aren't careful. What about Paleo? Here's what to know. While there is no rule that says cheese should be allowed, Paleolithic people did not eat cheese because of its dairy-rich content.

You can still eat moderate amounts of good-quality cheese if you don't want to avoid dairy. It all depends what you eat and how you react.

For instance, some individuals are highly lactose intolerant and should avoid dairy products or eat them only rarely and in small amounts. Some people can tolerate moderate amounts goat and sheep's dairy byproducts.

Many vegan options, such as almond cheese or coconut cheese, are available to those who prefer to eat less dairy and enjoy cheese. Such foods make it possible for those who follow a vegan lifestyle to still include some cheesy goodness in their diets without compromising their values or taste preferences!

Statistics

(3) The paleo diet eliminates dairy because its advocates say many people are lactose intolerant and because eating dairy has been associated with Crohn's disease, among other claims, according to a popular paleo diet website. (everydayhealth.com)
(9) These are just some reasons they're nixed from a paleo diet plan, according to a popular paleo diet website. (everydayhealth.com)
Dark chocolate: Choose one that has 70% or higher cocoa content. (healthline.com)
One study cited in the article, published in the European Journal of Clinical Nutrition, found that calcium intake levels among followers of the paleo diet were as low as 50 percent of the recommended daily value. (everydayhealth.com)
It's up to you to decide to what extent you want to follow those guidelines, but if you follow them 100%, you can be assured that you are eating the best food for your body and greatly investing in your long-term health and well-being. (paleoleap.com)

External Links

How To

How do I incorporate exercise into a paleo diet?

Striking the perfect balance of nutrition and exercise is essential for optimal health. But wanting to achieve this balance can be difficult to maintain, especially when your diet is restrictive. It can be challenging to follow a paleo diet because it cuts out certain food groups, such as dairy and grains.

The good news? You don't have to be a total nerd to include exercise into your diet. Begin by thinking about how to maximize your movement during the day. You could do this by taking a 10-minute walk after lunch, dinner, or standing up for short periods if you sit for too long.

Another option is high-intensity intertraining (HIIT). This involves switching between intense activity and short rest breaks. This workout is quick and efficient, takes less than 20 minutes, and doubles as strength training. HIIT exercises like burpees, squats, and jumping jacks are easy enough for beginners but complex enough for experienced exercisers too!

Mixing up endurance-type activities such a running, cycling or swimming is ok. These activities will help you burn calories, as well as providing mental health benefits through stress relief or endorphin boosts. These are great ways to incorporate exercise into a paleo diet while still eating healthy food.